"Oh, are you sleepy?" she asked, being completely serious. I nodded my head.
"And my headache never went away," I lied. I never had a headache in the first place. Don't get me wrong, I love Lori to death, like the sister I never had, like my best friend, but I was just getting sick of her!! Not only was I coming home for the summer because I needed a break from school but also because I needed a break from her.
"Okay, you don't have to tell me twice, I'll see you in the morning," she said, coming over and giving me a quick hug. "`Night."
"Yeah, goodnight," I replied. I waited for a few minutes before I even contemplated on if I should call Taylor. Was it too late? If I remembered correctly, he had his own phone number line and it shouldn't really bother anyone. Plus, I thought, they should be used to late night phone calls, right??
I picked up my phone and dailed the numbers tentatively. I prayed that it was the right number because I would feel horrible if it were wrong. After 2 rings, there was finally a groggy "`Lo?"
"Taylor?" I asked.
"Who is this?" he asked. I couldn't tell if he was being serious or if he was kidding. Then he repeated himself, "Who is this??"
"It's Brook. Look, I'm so sorry that I called this late, I don't know what came over me, I'll call you back tomorrow or something--"
"No, no, it's okay. I wasn't sure if it was you or not," he said and I could tell that he was slowly coming to.
"Well how many other girls call you at 2 am?" I asked.
"Do you want a serious answer to that question?" he retorted.
"Uh, I guess not, forget it," I said, rather embarrassed.
"I was just joking, chill," he replied. "What took you so long to call me?"
"Lori. She was in my room all night! I swear, I don't think she ever needs to sleep."
"Figures. Does she suspect anything?"
"She did, but then I told her that I have a huge disgust towards you and then she believed me," I said, not even thinking that comment would hurt his feelings. And I was glad when he laughed.
"Well, I'm glad you have a huge disgust for me. It must be opposite day, right?" he suggested, just like when we were younger.
"I don't know," I said, not knowing what else to say. Sure, I like him, I've liked him since forever, but I didn't know if this was something that I wanted to persue or not.
"That's not exactly what I was expecting to hear," Taylor admitted.
"Sorry, but it's all that you're going to get for now," I commented.
"Can we talk about this now? Because the sooner I find out what's going on, the better I'll feel."
"Okay, what do you want to talk about?" I asked. Since he brought it up, he was going to be the director. I would just follow his lead.
"Before Lori walked into the kitchen, we were going to kiss, weren't we?" he asked. The question sort of took me by surprise. I don't know why it shocked me as much as it did because I had been thinking about it the whole night, but to actually hear it come from his lips made it all seem more real.
"I don't know," I said. "I, uh, think so."
"Okay."
"Okay what??"
"Well, did you want it to happen?" he asked.
"I don't know, I mean I guess, I mean yeah, but no - urgh, I don't know!" I was confused.
"God, it's a simple yes or no question. Did you want it to happen?"
"Did you?"
"Yes," he told me. His voice didn't quiver when he said it, and he sounded completely sure of himself. I smiled. "Did you?"
"Yeah," I admitted. At that same time, I felt the urge that I had felt earlier. I wanted to feel his lips on mine, to feel his arms around my body, to feel his caress. But why am I feeling these things?
"Okay," he said again.
"Why?" I asked him. Now it was his turn to be put on the spot. I heard him take a breath before responding.
"Because it would have been nice," was all he revealed. Loser.
"Yeah, it would have been," I agreed. "Ya know, believe it or not, I've actually missed you since we've stopped talking. I didn't really realize it 'til now, but now I know that I did."
"Really?" he asked, sounding astonished. I shook my head even though he couldn't see it.
"Yeah, really," I said. "But, um, now what are we going to do?"
"Well, I know what I want, but I'm not so sure you'll go along with it," he said,
"Try me."
I listened intently as he voiced his opinion as to what our next step should be. It was not what I was expecting, not even close! However, he had me intrigued by his reasoning, by his words, by his voice. Everything about him made me want him and then I realized that his idea was going to be a lot more easier than it sounded.
"So, what do you think?" he asked me when he had finished his 10 minute long explaination.
"Sounds good; let's do it," I quickly answered. Which was greeted by silence. "Hello??"
"Are you for real? You're agreeing with me?" he asked, his voice full of disbelief.
"See you in 10 minutes," I said, hanging up the phone, not even waiting for a response or reaction. If I would have sat around and pondered about it, about his absurd idea, then I knew that I would have changed my mind. But it was my clear decisiveness that helped me track further than I ever imagined.
I slipped from my house with the greatest of ease. Everyone was fast asleep; I knew they were all exhausted from the party. My parents rarely stay up past 10:00, and they were up until midnight, so I knew they would be no problem. There was music coming from the spare room, where Lori was staying, so even if she wasn't sleeping, I knew she wouldn't have been able to hear me anyway. I smiled at the thought. Haha, I was sneaking out to see Taylor.
All the way to his house I kept thinking about Lori. What would she do if she found out about this? What would she say? Would she me mad at me? For some reason, nothing else entered my mind. It's strange that she's all I could think about when I was supposed to be thinking about Taylor.
As I neared his house, I noticed that he was sitting on his front porch, smoke blowing away from his body. Smoke? What from? It wasn't cold out to see breath. When I got closer, I saw the bright red illumination of a cigarette. Taylor smoked? Before I turned from the sidewalk, he threw the butt to the ground and smeared his shoe on it.
"How's it going?" he asked nochalontly, as though it was the first time we talked that night.
"It was better," I shot. I was angry about the smoke. "You stink."
"But I showered this week," he joked. I forced myself not to smile.
"I didn't know that you smoked," I said.
"Oh, yeah, not a good habit, huh?"
"No, it's not," I said, my voice dripping with hate. I couldn't stand smokers. Ironic, isn't it.
"I've been meaning to quit, honestly."
"Well, I'm not going to touch you so long as you're smoking. Gives you some incentive, doesn't it?" I threw. He seemed hurt, as if I were making a presumption about him.
"Brook, come on. You came over her because you wanted to, not because you wanted to imtimidate me or mock me. And you wanted to come over here before you knew that I smoked. It doesn't make me a different person. It's still me," he explained. He was right; I still wanted him. I reached in my pocket and pulled out a few just-in-case mints and offered him one. He gladly accepted.
"So, where are we going to go?" I asked, looking around, hoping that he didn't want to set up shop on his front porch.
"How 'bout my room?" he suggested. I looked at him, full of skepticism. He smiled, as if reassuring me, then pulled on my hand to follow him. We walked to his backyard, only it didn't look like I remembered it. There was an extension built on the back of the garage and that's where we went. He opened the door and allowed me to walk in ahead of him. Inside I saw a bed in the center of the room, shelves along the walls, an entertainment center opposite the foot of the bed, equipped with tv, dvd player, huge stereo, and loads of cds and dvds.
"You moved out," I commented. He smiled again. Oh, how I just loved that smile. Then I suddenly felt extremely uncomfortable and out of place. It didn't seem right. To be standing in his "apartment", knowing what was about to happen. Our eyes connected and he came closer and closer to me.
For the third time that night, I wanted to feel his lips so badly. Mine actually ached for his. I responded naturally to his walking closer to me. I lifted my arms and placed them around his neck. And then it happened. His lips finally met mine. At first, the kisses were quiet and had meaningless feeling. Only after about three minutes of little pecking did the actual kissing begin.
I don't know why I was surprised when he tempted to slide his tongue into my mouth. It was all I could really think about. However, I was surprised none the less, and my reaction to that was to pull away. When I first jerked a little, he stopped midkiss and backed from me.
"Maybe this wasn't such a good idea. You're not comfortable, I can tell," he insisted.
"I wouldn't have come if I didn't think it was a were a good idea," I told him.
"Maybe you should go," he said, not listening to what I had said.
"But I don't want to because I want you too much to leave."
Now that he heard. His eyes perked up and met with mine again. I rushed quickly to him and pressed myself against him seductively. I knew that caught his attention. Our intense kissing lasted until we were both standing there breathless. We began to lean back towards the bed, our breathing still heavy, eyes still connected. Once lying beneath him, we picked right back up again, our kisses still full of that unsatisfied need. He began to grind his area into mine, over top of our clothes, our lips still meeting. Though it seemed impossible, our breathing became more heavy than it was before as he continued to mesh against me.
My hands began to navigate downwards to the bottom of his shirt. Once they found the hemline, I tugged it off of his body, our lips only parting enough to remove his shirt completely and to exchange smiles.
"Stop," I said, before anything else happened. I pushed him up off of me and pulled myself into a sitting position.
"Huh?" he asked, confused.
"You do have the proper equipment, don't you?" I asked, just checking to make sure. I didn't want to get too far and then find out that he wasn't planning on bagging it up.
"What are you talking about? After what just happened and what you just felt, you mean to tell me that you don't think I'm really a guy?!" he asked, sounding offended. Omg, I couldn't help but laugh.
"Taylor, I've seen you before, I know you're a guy," I said, still not believing what he just said. Duh. "What I meant was, do you have any protection?"
He smiled an embarrassed smile. "So I guess this means that you actually want to keep going?" I nodded because I didn't think I could find my voice. I was too worked up at this point to even imagine not getting any. He quickly rolled over and pulled open a drawer from his bedstand and whipped out the tiny square package.
"Don't put it on just yet, I just wanted to make sure you had one," I told him, stopping him from opening it. As he reached over to set it back on the little tabletop, I rolled over on top of him and kissed him. He placed his hands under my tshirt and stroked the skin of my back. It felt so good, I loved having my back caressed. Before I knew it, my shirt was discarded to the floor as well and my bra soon followed.
"Can we turn on some music?" I asked, the silence getting on my nerves. He grabbed a remote from his bedstand and clicked a few buttons. Soon the sound of Moby replaced thet silence. Not like Moby was the best "mood" music, I was contented and allowed him to continue.
We fooled around for a little while longer until I knew that both of us had enough fooling around. I guess that you can only dry it for so long before that gets a little boring. I was the one that reached over and handed Taylor the condom. He seemed a little surprised, but he accepted it anyway. Then I had to wonder how many other girls he's been with. I considered myself a clean girl because I was only with one guy and we were both virgins, so I knew he was clean, too. I just had to ask.
"How many other girls have you been with?" I asked blunty. I could tell that the question took him for a loop.
"Why?" he asked, sounding a little annoyed.
"Don't I have a right to know?"
"Yeah, I guess," he agreed.
"Well?" I urged him to answer me
"Counting you?"
"Yeah, I guess."
"You'll be my third," he finally said.
"Okay," I said.
"Okay?"
"Yeah."
"It doesn't bother you?"
"No, because I was kind of expecting more than that. But I'm happy with that number; lucky number three," I said. He smiled.